Roller Coaster Feelings

Remember how in April I was super optimistic about working out and eating right?
Well, now I feel like crap.
Why?
A mixture of my job and having to sit on my butt all day and a mixture of emotional issues.
I felt great and really successful in my health endeavors up until last week when the Chrome 45 day fitness challenge began.
I paid $250 for 6 personal training sessions and a nutrition plan. It also came with body caliper testing, measurements, pictures... I was so excited the day of the meeting.
And then we took pictures of me with my shirt off. That was a humbling experience. Maybe I let it get to my head and let the self-loathing creep back into my mind. Whatever it was, I spiraled downhill pretty quickly and the next 5 days consisted of me treating myself like shit.
I drank some booze
I ate some crap food
and then I felt even worse about myself so I didn't work out. At least, not the way I have been the last few months.
Why don't I have the mental strength?
When will I learn?
I KNOW what is good for me and have a basic idea of what isn't. Yet, I still purposely CHOOSE the WRONG things. WHY!? In my mind I have argued with myself over and over and over and all day long and I have come up with a billion excuses. One excuse is that it is 9 days into the challenge and I still don't have a nutrition plan. That is primarily why I signed up for this challenge. I want to know exactly what I should be eating but I am frustrated because a plan still hasn't been sent to me. Is that an excuse? I don't know. Maybe. When left to my own devices I do the wrong things. Even when I think I am being healthy I may not be. Apparently sandwiches are bad for you...
*UGH*
Feeling defeated.
But it is time to pick myself up and try it again on my own.
This is the look of exhaustion:

On the plus side, grapes are in season and they are crunchy, just the way I like them :)

Flawless

I took a quick trip to Seattle with my gal pal, Olivia, last week so we could go see Beyonce in concert. And boy OH BOY, she is amazzzzzzing! Seriously, the most beautiful person I have ever seen. She can sing, she can dance, and her smile could melt anyone's heart. I may have developed a bit of a girl crush. She was seriously #Flawless.





I got to explore Seattle a little bit and it was wonderful catching up with Olivia. We did the shopping. We did the eating. We did the touristy things; Space Needle, Pike's Places, etc. It was awesome and great to get away from work for a short period of time.

Seattle can be kinda pretty, I suppose ;)

 

                                              #tourist

Lemon Cheesecake is BOMB!!!! :)

                                                                                               I swear, it looks like a spaceship

Health Journey

Okay, for once I am not going to complain. I know that the majority of my blog is just me whining like a little bitch. I will always be a whiney little bitch and hate everything and everyone because that is just who I am. I am pessimistic and cynical as HECK. But not today. Today I am golden.

The last couple months I have been trying to get serious about my health. It is not like I am trying to get healthy for anything in particular. I just want to feel and look better and to wake up and know that I am doing what I can to take care of myself. I do not want to wake up one day and to not be able to see my feet or tie my shoes or to develop heart disease or diabetes.

I have always been going to the gym with my husband but I have never taken it seriously. I mostly just wanted to spend time with him. In late January I started taking this booty boot camp class on Tuesday nights at Chrome Personal Training Centre. Its a half hour long class and it is TOUGH AS SHIT. Everyone who goes to the class is there for the same reason, more or less: to get fit, to learn and to grow dat booty! LOL A lot of the clients of Chrome are training hard to reach their goals of bodybuilding, bikini competitions, or whatever. The trainers believe in everyone giving it their all. Everyone is so focused and determined. It is something I have never seen or experienced before and it is insanely impressive, inspiring and motivating.

I have started to eat more healthy. I no longer consistently consume hot wings, garlic bread, pizza, pasta and packaged meals. I cut out alcohol. Quitting alcohol was due to a moment in December 2015 when I drank 3 bottles of wine in one night and ate a giant vat of fondue with bread and steak and got so sick. That was a wake-up call - an "ah-ha" Oprah moment where I realized that I eat a lot when I drink and that alone has probably contributed to a large amount of weight gain.

I have been focused more on organic fruits, veggies and natural carbs and sugars. I have eliminated almost all meat from my diet, except for grilled chicken which I eat ONLY for the protein. I actually hate the taste of meat now... I've been obsessed with my FitBit and love to see my miles and step count go up. I write down every single thing I eat and record how many calories, carbs, protein, I am consuming, etc.

I started C25K again. I am on week 3. I run Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings. I do the booty boot camp Tuesday and Saturday. Wednesday and Thursday night I do weights at Gold's Gym with my husband and Sunday is Leg day. Early Saturday morning before booty camp I try to go on a hike (weather permitting). I have drawn a calendar and put stickers on each day I work out. That has been almost every single day this month, besides 2 rest days.

There is a boot camp class at Gold's Gym that I have been meaning to try. I had been putting it off for the last month. I have been going to bed at night telling myself that I will wake up and just go and do it but each morning I change my mind. This morning my alarm went off. I told myself noooo, I am not going to go. But I laid there for another 10 minutes and was literally arguing with myself in my head. "Sarah, you've been doing this for weeks now, putting it off and putting it off. This is the last day you have to go and try it for FREE before they start charging for their classes. You are already awake. Just get up. Get up. GET UP!" and I say back to myself in my head "But I am tired"... "No you're not. You've been getting up this early for the last 3 weeks. Why are you lying to yourself?" ..."Okay, but I am scared of looking bad in front of everyone who has been doing it forever".... "Well, you go to Booty Bootcamp at Chrome and you look like an idiot in front of everyone but they don't even notice and when you do crappy people cheer you on and you keep going back"... "You know, Sarah, you have a good point. The worse that can happen is that I will go, hate it, fall and get laughed at, or have to run out and poop myself. Those are all okay options and the world will not end."...

So, I got out of bed and I went to the damn class. Yes, it was hard. Yes, it sucked, Yes, I was dripping with sweat and could not hold myself in push up position nearly as long or as well as everyone else. I was the newbie. But I am glad I went. The trainer, Charles, was right there with everyone, doing it with everyone, going to each person and showing them the proper form. And it felt awesome, even though I couldn't hold my own body weight up off the ground! I got a high five from Charles at the end and now I get to have a happy rest of the day knowing I DID SOMETHING.

I have lost 19lbs since January. Insane to think of how much weight that is but, being that I am so big, I do not see a difference in my body. I FEEL a difference. I am happier. I feel motivated. I wake up and don't feel tired. The other day, I pulled my work pants completely down without unbuttoning or unzipping them when those same exact pants were so tight and cutting off my circulation last summer. That is hilarious to me and also annoying because I cannot afford to buy new pants. LOL.

I know I can do better. I can do a better job at cutting out sugar. I can work out harder. I can get stronger. I can run faster.

And I will :)

This photo is current, April 2016. Let's remember this look. 72lbs away from goal weight. It may not look like I need to lose THAT much weight...but yes. Yes I do. Let's just say...You haven't seen me naked.... LOL

Confessions of a Property Manager pt 5

16) You know, it's always the people who complain the most that are actually biggest lease violators and worse residents.

Example: I have a resident, let's call him Timmy, who complained that his upstairs neighbors are loud all the time. They, let's call them Jane and Bob, are allegedly up all night and their dog jumps and barks all day long. When in reality, Jane and Bob work full time jobs and sleep all night and work all day, so there is no way they are "up all night." And while they are away their dog is kenneled and has a bark collar. Jane and Bob tell me that, in reality, Timmy is the loud one. He has a screaming child and he smokes pot all the time and the stench seeps up into their bathrooms but they haven't complained about it because they don't want to start a war. Jane and Bob bought a house and are moving out soon. Good for Jane and Bob. If only Timmy would leave so the good residents could stay...

Example: Let's call him Benjamin. Benjamin always has something to complain about. The sprinklers are going off. There is dog poop in the grass. The ground gets icy in the wintertime. Blah blah blah. But mister Benjamin and his wife fight all night long and can be heard yelling and swearing at each other to the point that police are called. The day after wife moves out a new girl arrives. Oooooh, looks like Benjamin had a girlfriend... #scandal! xoxo, Gossip Girl

Example: Let's call her Sally. Sally drives recklessly. Sally has a messy patio covered in cat litter boxes. Sally has 3 vehicles and a trailer that she never registered with the office. Sally decides to leave town for 3 months. We had to repave our parking lot. I sent out letters and emails a handful of times to residents letting them know ahead of time that all vehicles will be towed on a particular morning if they do not move them. A large vehicle was left in the parking lot with an out of state plate and expired tabs. I had the vehicle towed across the street, where is sat for a week before I had to get it actually towed to am impound. The next day Sally returns and asks me if I know anything about her vehicle. Oh, Sally, was that vehicle yours? The one you never told me about? The one with out of state plates? The one with expired tabs? Sally gets mad and says I should have called her and told her about the repaving of the lot. Because yeah, I had time to personally call all 200 of my residents.... Sally demands I pay for her car to get out of impound. No Sally. No... It is time for YOU to adult now, Sally... #adulting #responsibilities

Example: Let's call him Cory. Cory has an outdoor cat. The lease states that all animals need to be on a leash at all times in the community. ALL ANIMALS, Cory! At one point, we had 4 cats roaming the community, spraying buildings and shitting on people's patios! We caught one and took it to SCRAPS. I got complaints from a handful of Cory's neighbors that he has an outdoor cat. I sent a letter to the community regarding outdoor pets and that it is not a thing that can happen. Cory called me and said he was allowed to have an outdoor cat. I said "Show me this in writing where this is permitted." Cory couldn't prove it and he was mad. He said cat is a companion animal for anxiety but the cat gives him anxiety when it is indoors...So cat NEEDS it to be outside all by itself... *rolls eyes* Nope, Cory, you can't have an outdoor cat. 

Example: Let's call him grumpy. Grumpy is a hoarder and he smells. Grumpy's dumpy car leaks oil all over my parking lot every day. Grumpy complains that I send out notices left and right for fun. Grumpy doesn't renew his lease in time, after I sent him 2 letters, 1 email and gave him 1 courtesy phone call. Grumpy gets mad when his lease reverts to month-to-month at the market value. Grumpy is grumpy about this and yells that he is going to sue me and calls my boss. My boss tells him to just leave. Grumpy leaves, alright. But he grumps his way through it and tells me it's MY fault that he has to move. Grumpy hoarded for 20 years so moving was hard... Grumpy needed my graciousness to allow him to stay an extra 5 days because he has so much filth to remove from the apartment. Grumpy is gone now. #ByeGrumpy

Example: Let's call him psycho. Psycho complains that he hates when people post things on his door. He complains that banks are legalized thieves. He complains that the internet is evil and the government is corrupt. He has a distrust for technology. All of a sudden, psycho has an issue with his garage. We replace the motor for him. He still insists it doesn't work. Everything is brand new but when he pushes the button on his remote nothing opens. We replace his motor again. He keeps having this issue. Come to find out, he is pushing his remote button in one millisecond, which is not enough time to let the remote communicate to the motor to trigger it to open. Psycho is impatient and cannot take a full 1-2 seconds to push the button. Psycho gets mad. Psycho tries reprogramming his garage himself and that really messes things up. Psycho screams at the leasing consultant and the maintenance guy. The very next day I try to talk to psycho and help him and walk him through how to properly operate his garage remote. But psycho doesn't like this and psycho screams and curses in my face and throws my office chair and punches my desk like a TOTAL psycho. I call the police on psycho. Psycho has a concealed weapon and takes controlled substances. Psycho continues to be psycho and sends me hate mail via certified letter.... And psycho was the one who had something to complain about. Sheesh.... #psycho

I think I need a vacation?

Merry Christmas Eve and other stuff

Another Christmas Eve is here. I really think I enjoy Christmas Eve more than Christmas Day. The anticipation was always more fun to me--Besides when I very first woke up early in the morning Christmas Day when it was still dark outside and saw the glow of the Christmas lights and all the huge presents under the tree and my stocking STUFFED with fun things. I always loved opening my stocking presents the most. But Christmas Eve was always when my family did the dinner and the parties and the fun stuff.
This year I am working from 8:30AM-3:00PM (which doesn't make sense) and then we will be heading to the annual Christmas Eve open house at a friends house for some wine and snacks. Then the usual dinner at my parents house and most likely an annual viewing of "It's a Wonderful Life"--the BEST Christmas movie!

Anyway, I missed mentioning a lot of things the last month.

November 17th Spokane saw the worst storm since the ice storm of 1997. We had a wind storm that knocked out power to over 100,000 people. (That included me and my parents.) Trees went down everywhere. Heck, people even died by trees falling on them. I was only out of power for 28 hours. But my parents were out of power for a full week. So, I held them hostage at my house for a few days. It was actually really nice! The power should go out for a bit every year just to remind people that electronics are not the most important thing in the world--family is. Heck, I know that I realized how reliant I was on my phone and iPad. And I only lost power for one day. I was DYING not having my phone fully charged. Or having Netflix. We were so bored at night that we went to bed at 7PM! Very sad. But it was a good experience.

November 17th happened to also be the same day that I switched property management companies. The owners switched from a laaaarrrrrge company to a small company. So far the experience has been interesting. I learned my lesson and realized that I must not EVER spend my own money on work related items.

Hmmmm, what else....

Last night was interesting. Every year there is a house on Glenrose that synchronizes lights in their yard to Christmas music. It's a fun little thing. Last night Josh and I were finished at the gym and got the wise idea to drive to the house in our gym clothes and of course we were driving in his 1980-something manual BMW beater car (which he insisted upon because it is the only of the 2 vehicles with snow tires and he believes it is safer...LOL). It is snowy outside. He parked and turned off the car and we listened to the show for maybe 5 minutes before we decided to leave. During the show, the car kept inching forward and down into a dip by the fence-line. (I do not understand why manual vehicles do this. Apparently they can't handle small hills.) Anyway, Josh tried to turn on the car and it was dead. LOL. The crap battery died after 5 minutes. So ridiculous. We had to call my parents and they came and jumped us and then pushed the car out of the snow. What an adventure. I learned that my husband gets angry very quickly. I thought it was funny. He did not.

I look forward to New Years Eve, as my best friend Christy is coming to town with her boyfriend and the 4 of us will be spending a night at the Davenport downtown and doing wine tasting and bar hopping. I can't wait!!!!

I am very happy that Christmas Day is on a Friday this year, as is New Years Day. So, I get 2 three day weekends in a row.

BOOYAH!

Merry Christmas

The most annoying human things

1) Clip my nails. I HATE clipping my nails. I get so annoyed when my nails grow out because I seriously hate standing there in the bathroom and clipping them and filing them. I almost would rather not have nails. I've never had fake nails. That sounds freaking miserable.

2) Cutting my hair. I hate when my hair gets long and is in my face and takes forever to wash in the shower and to dry. But I also hate going to get a haircut because it costs a lot of money and they always tell me "Oh you should be cutting your hair more than once a year because your ends are so dead".... well you know what, all my hair is dead. It's all dead. And I just hate it. I hate that I have to brush it. I hate when it is in my face. I hate when I have to sit there and pay someone to cut it.

3) Wearing make-up. Okay, this is not a thing that every human must do. Just women. Society has pressured women into believing that they must have make up on to be pretty. They've even done surveys that determine that women look to be more intelligent and trustworthy if they are wearing make up. It is even in my dress code at work that "make up should be worn." I just hate that. Haaaattteee wearing make-up. I think everyone should just have a clean face. CLEAN.

4) Shaving. It just takes forever. I know I have to shave though because I cannot bear the thought of having hairy legs or armpits or.... yuck. I just don't like the act of shaving. It is time consuming, boring, and very dangerous! Think about it...

At the end of the day, the only human thing that I have to do that I LOVE to do is eat and sleep. I could ditch the rest.

Whidbey Island

For the weekend of my 26th birthday my husband and I got a groupon for a 2 night stay at "The Captain Whidbey Inn" on Whidbey Island. It is this old old Inn that is 108 years old, built in 1907, in Coupeville. The Inn was soooooo cute! No televisions in the rooms, lots of antiques and you have to share a bathroom with everyone who is staying at the Inn. There are only about 12 rooms in the Inn. Downstairs is a huge fireplace and a small restaurant which I would consider "fine dining." Cuz daaaaang my filet was fine! So good!
We spent the weekend playing board games in our little room, exploring Oak Harbor, Anacortes, Deception Pass, and even drove to Bellingham in the afternoon because it was only an hour away. In Bellingham we went to the museum of electrical invention. At night we went to a haunted house at Ford Casey (the Admiralty Lighthouse). The following day we went back to Fort Casey to see what it looked like during the day and it had amazing views of the water and Port Townsend (at least I think that was Port Townsend I could see?). It was a quick weekend trip but a great trip. Hope to go back some day. I was telling Josh that I could definitely live on Whidbey Island, if we haaaaad to move to the west side.

 Captain Whidbey Inn

 Downtown Coupeville

 Delicious freaking Filet dinner at Capt Whidbey Inn

 Cannon at Fort Casey, Coupeville

 Josh at the Admiralty Lighthouse, Coupeville

 On the Ferry to Whidbey. Josh's first time on a ferry

Sister Times

My mom and I flew down to Nashville September 10th to surprise Karen for her 23rd birthday! We showed up at her work and she was so surprised and we all cried. It was all the awesome feelers.

We toured the Grand Ol Opry, the Belle Meade Plantation and the Jack Daniels distillery. We ate at Cracker Barrel, had some good pulled pork an drank a lot of wine. It was a quick 4 day trip. I wish it lasted longer! It was awesome. The weather was good. The food was good. The company was good. The only bad thing is the drivers. People canNOT drive in Nashville! AT ALL!!!! My rental car got a boo-boo :(
We left early morning September 14th. Leaving sister was hard. I wish she would come home.
Here are some photos from the trip!

 Mom and I on the plane on our way to Nashville

 Karen and mom crying. What BABIES! ;)

 The Grand Ol Opry. So magical!

 Belle Meade Plantation. Lots of AWESOME history there

Confessions Of A Property Manager pt 4

11) I feel so powerful when residents actually do what I say. For example: The community is about to have some asphalt repairs done tomorrow. I sent out reminders last night telling them all vehicles need to be out by 7AM tomorrow. I go outside today and see everyone is already mostly out and parked along 51st ave. I'm so...powerful! Dance, monkey's, dance! Mwahahaha. Little do they know there aren't really asphalt repairs to do. I just want to see how many people read my notices... lol! JK.

12) I love when residents bring me food.

13) I love when residents bring me literally ANYthing besides a complaint

14) I love when residents think I am funny and laugh at my jokes

15) I love when past residents come back upset about being sent to collections due to damages and they want to dispute them. So, I send copies of the photos and the actual invoices to my receivables department and the resident ends up owing MORE than I originally charged them! LOL

Guitar

I have been really stressed the last month. The stress is about 99% work related. After a long day of work I come home and just feel drained and miserable. I could turn to alcohol and food but....no, wait, never mind, let's just go ahead and admit I will always do that because I am an emotional eater and have a constant love affair with food.

But my point is that I've started doing something that I haven't done in a long long long looooong time. I picked up my guitar! I stopped playing YEARS ago. Why? I actually do not know. I guess I kinda stopped when I went to college. Perhaps I stopped in high school. I can't quite remember. I suppose I had other things to do. I stopped having the patience, diligence and time that it takes to practice and learn. Heck, I still don't have a lot of patience. I have found the time. Less Netflix/TV. But at least I now have something to look forward during my day. I look forward to coming home from work so I can sit down, release all thoughts of the day and just focus on my beautiful purple instrument. I've noticed that it is very therapeutic to spend all my brain energy on learning a new song. I actually get to focus and think about something that makes me happy.

So rarely am I able to do that. Just be happy, that is. Working does not make me happy. I do not feel an ounce of genuine happiness from the time my alarm goes off in the morning until the time I come home from work. That's not to say that I do not like my job or that I am necessarily unhappy. Because that's not true. I would say I am indifferent. I certainly do not feel that passion or fire the way I thought one should feel about their choice in life work... Anyway, I digress...

I LOVE to sing. Singing is my most favorite thing to do in the world! Since I was a little kid nothing made me happier than to make sounds with my voice. Ask my mother. I was a loud child, whether I was happy or sad. Oh, how I miss singing with a group of people! I would literally get tears in my eyes while singing with other people. I miss that feeling! I feel a hint of that again when I pick up my guitar and sing. I feel that emotion and that passion and I have fun! Every other thought and worry just disappears when I can just pick the notes and sing.

I am going to try to work on my Youtube channel and post some things for fun.

Netflix

Netflix is hands down one of the best things ever invented. Thanks to Netflix I never want to see the light of day!
But, Netflix, what do you mean "are you still watching American horror story?" Uh.....yeah.....I wouldn't just sit here for 3 hours and quit like that. Don't make me bend over for the remote. Why do you do this to me?